been a little while...

I know that it has been a little while since I last posted.  It's made me pretty sad that I have not been able to keep up with it.  I feel like things have gotten away from me lately, and the past months ran by without taking me along.  Here's how things have been playing out.
In February we got a puppy, Charlie.  He is pretty much one of the best things to happen to me.  Now I know how proud moms feel.  I have tons of pictures on phone and pretty much make up reasons to brag about him.

Isn't he the most adorable thing you've ever seen?  Maybe I'm just a little biased.  Charlie has been running my life!  It's like having a baby.  I worry about him while I'm at work.  For the first few nights I would wake up and think I heard him crying.  For the first week we had him, my husband was away, so I spent a lot of my time just following Charlie around.  It's kind of incredible how much care they require.  The most frustrating part was that, unlike a child once they reach toddler age, he couldn't tell me what he needed.  I just had to keep guessing.  Charlie has kept me guessing, but has brought so much joy to our lives.  Wheaten Terriers are known for the greeting they give everyone who comes into their home, especially their humans.  Coming home from work to that little face everyday, jumping with joy to see you, can really help a bad day melt away.  Charlie time is my favorite time!  

I also spent some time working on myself.  The spring time has been tough for me so far this year.  It is the busy season at work, lots of tempers flaring.  Work has been taxing emotionally lately and I have been struggling not to take things personally.  I am very contentious and so any time anyone is unhappy, I take it as a direct reflection of my work.  Even if what is going on has nothing at all to do with me.  Am I self-centered?  Or is it really just because I hate conflict?  I couldn't tell you.  But what I can tell you is that I find this is a problem a lot of young, female professionals face.  Fortunately I have an amazing support system at work.  I share a work space with 4 other amazing women who challenge and support me everyday.  We have created a sacred space where we all can admit to our shortcomings without judgment, voice concerns and receive useful and innovative feedback, and laugh about the crazy things that happen during our days.  I have heard more times than I can count that personal life and professional life should be kept separate, but as someone who takes their professional life so personally, it has been so helpful to find a few individuals at work with whom I can be myself.  We have laughed together and kept each other from crying with frustration and all in all, done an amazing job of supporting each other throughout.  Our job has many ups, downs, and stressful daily moments and I have a tough time dealing with them alone.  

Reflecting upon myself has required a lot of hard work.  I did a lot of this alone while tackling the task of taking down wallpaper and painting the bare walls and trim.  When I'm having a tough time, I often turn to cleaning.  My grandmother always told my mom that when she was having a bad day to "wash your kitchen floors, scour your pots, wash your windows."  What she knew that we didn't, was cleaning gives you a systematic way to release all the energy you build up.  When I'm struggling, my mind goes on and on and on and on, and then I turn to shopping.  I may not be able to control what goes on in my head, but I can control what people see on the outside.  Regulating my wardrobe is a huge part of how I try and de-stress.  In the long run, it only causes more stress: buyer's remorse, poor financial choices, all that jazz.  Cleaning however, is a great and productive (and financial guilt free!) way to clear your mind.  For me, painting requires so much attention to detail that I must focus 100% of my attention on not messing up.  And I get instant results!  Bonus!  No one can critique me until I am sure the walls are perfect!  I can do it alone without over thinking it!  It's also amazing how responsive Charlie has been to my moods.  He knows exactly when I'm off and how to deal with it.  He jumps up into my lap and is happy to sit there and let me talk to him about my day.  I am a huge advocate of puppy therapy.  

My other favorite coping strategy lately - painting my nails.  Another chance to be perfect without disrupting anyone else.  This little indulgence is just for myself.  No one can take that time away from me because I have to sit quietly, without my phone and computer, and let them dry.  I've gotten pretty good at it.  Sometimes I'm painting them once a week.  Other weeks I'm painting them once a day.  Control. Perfection. Erase errors quickly.  Instant results.  Total concentration required.  The ultimate coping mechanism for the girl who over-thinks.  Once I'm polished to perfection I feel like I can take on the world.  

Through my soul searching the past few months I have realized that when I feel shaky on the inside I am always sure to put a strong front on the outside.  Pushing myself to always wear a smile started to wear away at me and led to a heart to heart with one of my (many) supervisors.  He told me that on top of worrying about all the things I worry about, I shouldn't be concerned with stopping my over thinking right now.  He put me at ease letting me know that what I'm going through is very common for my age and that he went through the same thing.  He said it took him years to learn to really be confident in all situations and never question himself.  He reminded me that it is okay to show weakness and to let things bother me (within reason).  It is okay to be human.  By trying to always be perfect and keep everyone happy I was sacrificing my own happiness.  At this point I cracked a joke about myself and he laughed and said that as long as I could laugh at myself, he knew I would be fine.  He promised to always reassure me I was doing the right things.  These reminders are something I value, as I have found that not many of my young professional friends feel supported in this way.  We left his office and headed to another meeting laughing, and I knew that all the work I was doing was slowly paying off. I realized that among the other things I worried about each day, I did not need to also worry about worrying.  It made no sense.  

Now that I have worked on myself, I feel better I feel better equipped to get back into my blogging.  Part of taking care of myself is doing things that I enjoy.  And writing here is one of them!  I hope that anyone else who has felt this way finds this little beacon of hope that it will all be fine and things are not worth sacrificing your own happiness.  Take time for yourself.  Relax.  Practice yogs (I start again tomorrow night with my best girlfriend!).  Walk the dog.  Read that new book you have put off.  Take a bubble bath.  Paint your nails.  Clean.  Focus that energy on something productive.  Something that will leave a mark on your life.  Remember to be the one in control of your life, an only attempt to manage what is reasonable for one person!  

xx

Skin Care Favorites

I have a love/hate relationship with my skin.  I love it because it has been pretty self-sufficient.  I hate it because I am getting to an age where I really notice a difference if I don't get the right amount of sleep and take my makeup off every night.  In my early 20s I could fall asleep with a full face of makeup on after a long night out with girlfriends, wake up, run a wash cloth over my face, and be fresh and clean for brunch.  Now as my late 20s roll through I notice more dry spots, problem areas, dark circles...all the great things that come with wisdom (maybe it's really just age...).  Up until my grandmother passed away she always had the softest, most radiant skin I had ever seen.  I remember even in her last days her skin still was fabulous.  She believed that pampering her skin was not a luxury but necessity.  Growing up I was so busy I never took her words to  heart.  I moisturized when I remembered, wore minimal makeup, and minimal products.  I have really jump started a skin care regimen that has me clean, glowing, and looking awake and refreshed (even when I'm not!).  Here are the 6 easy products I have fallen in love with.  

[1] Origins Active Charcoal Mask: Oh my gosh!  This mask is wonderful!  I found it as a sample from Sephora.  It looks really scary and harsh when applying it to your face, but it feels great when you take it off.  I try and use it once per week to keep my face clean, clear, and smooth.  

[2] St. Ives Apricot Cleanser: I can't find this cleanser in Target, where I usually get my products, but had to hunt it down.  I found it a grocery store a few towns over...its worth the hike.  The cleanser is much more gentle for daily use.  It has a smaller content of exfoliators, so it does not take off too much skin.  It is a great cleanser to use morning and night, gentle but effective on makeup and daily grime. 

[3] Clinique Dramatically Different Moisturizing Lotion: This moisturizer has been in my repertoire for years because it never changes. If its not broke, don't fix it!  I love the feeling of my skin after putting on this moisturizer.  In the morning I apply after washing my face and dry my hair while letting it sink in.  Once dry it provides a great base for makeup and leaves me glowing without makeup.  

[4] Kiehl's Creamy Eye Treatment with Avocado: I dreaded getting to the age where I needed eye cream.  As soon as I started using this, I wished I had sooner.  It is great.  Smooth, creamy, blends well.  I like to use it before my eyeshadow.  It acts as a great primer and keeps even the most delicate of eyeshadows in place all day.  At night it goes on cool to refresh my skin after a day of squinting at the computer.  

[5] St. Ives Apricot Scrub: I've kept this scrub in my bathroom for as long as I can remember.  It is more harsh than the cleanser so I try to only use it once or twice per week.  I also love it for rough knees and elbows.  I find the best way to exfoliate without ripping off all my skin is in a gentle circular motion.  If your skin is tugging and pulling with your hand, you're pushing too hard.  Exfoliator should buff off the dead and damaged skin, so rubbing it on top of the skin, rather than scrubbing hard, is more effective.  Taking off too much skin isn't good either so keep it gentle to get the perfect glow.  

[6] Neutrogena Makeup Remover Cleansing Towelettes: These are a God-send for busy girls on the go.  They take makeup off quickly and effectively.  They have dissolved even the most stubborn of waterproof mascara.  That dark, sexy, smoky eye for a party - gone in two seconds with a single swipe!  Sometimes they do feel like they leave a little film, so I like to swipe over my skin with a wet cotton ball or toner afterwards.  

Any make up favorites I haven't tried?  Send them over!

Happy New *You*

I apologize for becoming a little neglectful of my posts.  I really enjoy writing and taking photos for the blog.  Sometimes it is hard for me to find a good balance of work, family, life, and posts.  This New Year gives me an opportunity to think in terms of New *You*.  So many times resolutions are made, only to be broken months, days, weeks, even hour after.  I feel that having resolve is the key thing; we should have resolve to meet our goals, rather than make resolutions.  To me "resolution" sounds like we are clearing things up, rather than meeting or achieving new standards of success.  My list of goals is pretty extensive.  I tend to be a little OCD and accomplish everything at once.  This is physically impossible and despite that I am always crushed when I cannot meet my own challenging goals.  This year, among many other things, I want to take things slow.  Set goals I know I can get to without overwhelming myself.  Posting regularly here is one of those things.  It is a great outlet, a forum to share things with everyone, anyone really.  I will keep updating briefly on goals I've set for this year and get set on a solid schedule of posts.  I hope that you are having a wonderful 2013 and that your aspirations for the year come easily! 
xox 

Sweater Solutions

Its no secret that I love sweaters.  I am cold all the time, so sweaters are my saving grace.  I'm that girl in the summer who throws on a sweater with shorts.  My friends think I'm crazy, but I love my sweaters.  What I don't love about my sweaters is seeing the "Dry Clean" label on the tag.  Ugh! Nothing takes away from finding a great sweater than seeing that it will need to be dry cleaned after wearing.  To me spending money on dry cleaning is wasted shopping money.  Every now and then I will dry clean when I know that my clothes need some TLC, but for the most part, I am a washing machine girl.  So at the beginning of this sweater season I set out to find fool-proof way (note: I move way quickly, and mess things up in the blink of an eye) to wash my sweaters without schlepping to the dry cleaner once a week and dropping $100 that could be spent on a great new outfit.  

First I started with some good old Googling.  I will admit, I have thrown merino sweaters through the wash before, so I knew that occasionally that was okay, but I was scared to wash my cashmere collection.  I have used cashmere sprays and the like, but I wanted a way to really know that my sweaters were clean.  On of the first stops on my search was The Laundress.  I have purchased items from their sweater care collaboration with J.Crew (cashmere spray, sweater comb, and collars and cuffs bar), all of which are completely fabulous.  The sweater spray smells amazing!  I use it on everything - sweaters, wool scarves, wool jackets, etc.  When I saw their care instructions grid, I knew it would have some answers.  It is awesome!  It lets you know what can be washed, when to dry clean, when to machine wash...amazing!  Next I found the Recipe page.  Also awesome.  The laundry experts let me know that you can machine wash cashmere and wool and that it is recommended over dry cleaning.  The harsh chemicals in dry cleaning can destroy fibers.  With their tips in mind (and some advice from my cashmere loving friends) I put my good faith in the recipe and headed to the washer.  Here is how I got my sweaters so fresh and so clean!  

1.  Make sure you have mesh bags.  I had purchased some when I was in college to make sure that I did not lose socks (I hate odd socks!  Drives me nuts!) and unmentionables in the communal washers.  They have packs of them in varying sizes at Target with the hangers, irons, and drying racks.  I used 5 at a time.  

2.  Split your sweaters up by color.  I went on a sweater cleaning binge and washed every sweater I owned.  In the future I would not do this again as I did not have enough room to dry them all at one time and did not have sweaters to wear during the process.  

3.  Load sweaters into mesh bags.  My bags were all what I would call "medium" sized.  They fit about 3-4 sweaters each, depending on how chunky or fine the knit.  Before I loaded my sweaters into the bags I checked every, single, care instruction.  Some said hand wash, some said dry clean, if it said "dry clean only" I thought twice, checked back with The Laundress and ultimately used my best judgement. Also, make sure all of your sweaters are inside out!  Especially if they have embellishment.  

4.  Load up the washing machine.  My five mesh bags filled the washer nicely with enough room for them to float around without getting crushed.  

5.  I set the washer on cold and delicate cycle.  These two things are key to successfully machine washing sweaters.  (Keep reading to find out why you should use cold!  Ugh!) I let the washer fill up and kept the lid open.  If you watch, the sweaters will float up on top of the water.  I put on rubber gloves (the water was freezing!) and as the washer filled up, pushed the sweaters underwater.  

6.  Instead of using The Laundress' sweater wash (I was too impatient to order, wait, then wash) I went on the advice of a friend and washed my sweaters with Johnson's Baby Shampoo.  I keep some in the house because it is so gentle.  (I once had an eye doctor recommend using it to wash off eye makeup! Works like a charm!)  Once the washer was full I squeezed some shampoo into the washer.  I was nervous to use too much because I did not want the agitation to foam up the shampoo and make a mess.  If you use the delicate cycle, you'll be fine; baby shampoo does not create too much lather.  

7.  As soon as the cycle is over, pull your sweaters out of the washer.  Air dry all sweaters. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT, put your sweaters in the dryer.  If you do, be ready to have the best dressed nieces/little cousins.  They will come out tiny!  I was careful with which sweaters I hung up to dry and which I laid flat to dry.  The more delicate fine knit sweaters needed to be laid out, while other loftier knits I could hang on a drying rack (and even a hanger when I ran out of space!)  The Laundress website recommended laying each sweater out on a towel and rolling it up to pull out the excess water.  I found that my washer's spin cycle got most of the water out so I did not use this step very much.  

8.  Be patient.  Some of my cashmere sweaters took a few days to dry.  Most of my fine knit merino sweaters were done over night.  With some of my sweaters I had to turn them inside out again after the first day.  The outside would be dry and the inside still wet.  Patience is key.  

9.  This is totally optional - steam or iron sweaters.  I love things wrinkle free and after coming out of the washer, a lot of sweaters hold on to wrinkles.  I have better luck ironing merino on the wool setting with a lot of steam (be gentle and keep the iron moving) and steaming cashmere while it hangs.  These two things can take a lot of time.  I like to do this over the weekend or the night before I know I will need to wear them (see: the art of planning outfits).


Now...what happens when one of these steps goes amiss?  Well, that happened to me over the weekend.  
I was totally rushing and put a small load of laundry in the washer.  I put one of my favorite sweaters into a mesh bag, dropped everything into the washer, ran to take care of something else, came back to the washer later, and started my load like normal forgetting about my sweater!  Yikes!  I ran the load on Hot/Cold.  A day or so later, my husband went to change the laundry over, wasn't sure how long the load had been in there and ran it through again! On hot/cold! Double Yikes!  When I heard the washer finish up I grabbed my non-dryer items out and found my sweater bag at the bottom.  My stomach dropped through the floor.  My beloved sweater could fit a 4th grader.  Trying to be resourceful (and let's face it, my sweater is a couple years old and I couldn't find another for sale online) I again turned to Google.  I found a site with tons of suggestions on how to reverse my damage.  The important thing is not to let the sweater dry that size. Here's what I did...

1. I read that soaking the sweater in lukewarm water with conditioner will help to loosen up the fibers.  I filled a big Tupperwear bowl with cool water,  let it sit to get to room temperature, and squirted in some conditioner.  The conditioner may look like little blobs floating in the water.  Don't worry, that will work itself out.  

2. I grabbed my sweater and dunked it in and out of the water.  The conditioner broke up and dispersed into the water and the sweater.  Immediately I could feel a difference in the fibers of the sweater.  It was like magic.  

3. While the sweater was soaking I slowly started to stretch it out.  Wool is very durable (I talked to my mom who is a big knitter and she clued me in).  It is really hard to tear wool, so its okay to give it a stretch.  

4. I let the sweater soak for about a half hour.  Meanwhile I cleaned out the kitchen sink thoroughly.  Once the half hour was up I dumped out the conditioner water, and rinsed the sweater under cool water to get the conditioner out.  When rinsing, be careful not to let the conditioner suds up.  I filled the bowl back up with water and dipped then gently squeezed out the conditioner and water.  

5. Once I finished rinsing I gently squeezed the water out of the sweater.  I grabbed my husband and had him help me stretch the sweater.  He took the bottom I took the top and we started to pull.  In between I would hold the sweater up to myself to see how much further we needed to go.  We each pulled the arms of the sweater.  Be careful to hold the sweater at the wrists and the shoulders.  You don't want to stretch the shoulders too much. Keep checking to make sure that all seams and sleeves line up to as close as "normal" as possible.    

6. Once I felt my sweater was stretched back to where I could wear it again (at 5'10" it was a lot of stretching!), I laid the flat on the top of a towel.  I folded the bottom half of the towel up over the sweater (a towel sweater sandwich if you will).  I then tightly rolled the sweater up in the towel and twisted it tight.  Hold it for a minute or two.  You will feel the water soak into the towel.  Its kind of cool how much absorbs so quickly. 

7.  Next I took the sweater out of the towel and laid it flat to dry on a clean, dry towel.  I reshaped the sweater to a normal shape, stretched it a bit more for good measure, and let it air dry.  I checked back on it a few times to make sure that in drying it didn't shrink back up.  

Its not back to how it was, but it is wearable again.  I am confident that with some wear and some more stretching it will be back to normal.  

Remember sweater-lovers, don't dry clean or donate until you have exhausted all of your options.  Always Google...someone out there has had this happen to them too and most likely, there are bloggers out there happy to post their tips!  

Holiday Gifting

My favorite time of the year is officially here!  I love the holidays more than any other time.  If we could have, we would have gotten married around the holidays.  I love it!  After the Black Friday rush dies down I love going out and browsing around for holiday gifts.  One of my favorite feelings is knowing how much someone will like a gift.  It really is the best.  Growing up when I would holiday shop, without fail, I would end up giving everyone their gifts when I got home.  I had such trouble waiting for the big day!  

I have spent this Black Friday snuggled up at home browsing around online.  I have a hard time looking for Black Friday deals because I feel so much of it is geared toward the technology industry and I don't usually shop there for gifts.  Although this year we did snag an iPad for my dad with a Black Friday deal!  (Yay!) I don't really like dealing huge crowds, hunting for parking spots, and making gift decisions on the spot "because they are a good deal."  I like to take my time and wait for the right gifts to jump out at me.  I started a bit of my holiday shopping online today, and I am so excited for what I found.  Here are some of my favorite gifts this year!

For Moms/Sisters/Girlfriends:
-I love personalized gifts!  I think they are unique and thoughtful.  For my personalized gifts I've  been looking at May Books notebooks and note cards.  The zebra print is to die for! 
-There are also a lot of great options at Anthropologie.  
         - This necklace is great for the glamour girl in your life.  
         - I love giving their kitchen gadgets to friends.  These totally stole my heart! 
         - These chalkboard storage jars would make a great gift for new homeowners.
         - This candle smells great and looks just as great on a vanity once its empty. 
-The Kate Spade Gift Guide is always some place I find something for every lady on my list. (There are also a few things on here I'm hoping to find under the tree... 1 / 2 / 3 / 4


For Husbands/Boyfriends/Dads/Brothers: 
- This year I went to The Art of Shaving.  What a great place!  I had never thought of looking at luxury shaving products for men!  Women get tons of luxe beauty products, why shouldn't men get to pamper themselves in the bathroom too?  I got my husband a great mid-size kit to start him off with.  The lather that he will get with a brush is pretty amazing!  If he likes it I can start to get him more pieces and better brushes.  I hope he likes it!  
- For my brother I grabbed some flannels from the Gap and these hilarious boxers.
- The men in my life are very outdoors-y and so my favorite place to look for their gifts is REI.  

I hope that your Black Friday is relaxing and crowd free.  I think we are pondering a trip to target...yikes!  

electric plaid

I love plaid and I love neon.  So this neon plaid silk top was a no brainer!  I wanted to get the whole outfit from J.Crew - matching top and skirt - but didn't feel like it would fly at work. Today I toned my electric plaid and neon pumps down with a camel pant, finished with a poppy hem.  The poppy was close enough to the neon without looking too matchy, and tan complimented the plaid perfectly!  I must say I was a little nervous about the shoes, but decided to go for it without looking back.  A neon orange shoe gets a lot of attention (so be ready!) but I was surprised by how many people loved them!  All in all, neon + camel = great day!  Enjoy!

It was a J.Crew kind of day: Electric plaid top, color-block cafe capri, neon persimmon Etta pumps, assorted bracelets.  Watch: gift from hubs :) 

Outfit Inspiration

I love waking up and taking my time in the morning.  The early morning rush to work is not my thing and so that is why I try and plan my outfits for the week over the weekend.  I try to take a little bit of time, sift through some magazines and catalogs, take a peek at some images I have dogeared and get to work in my closet.  I keep my magazines, J. Crew and Anthropologie catalogs all in one place and when I can't think of anything new and fresh on my own I flip through for some inspiration.  I may not have every piece in an outfit, but I find it pretty easy to subsitiute pieces I do have, or change the color scheme to better fit my closet.  I find that taking the time to sit down and think about what I am going to wear, before I actually need to wear it makes my mornings a lot easier, and my "go-to" outfits are used less frequently.  I also hop on to Instagram, Pinterest, and some of my favorite fashion blogs and take a look at what others are doing and figure out how I can make them my own.  Another really great way to find an outfit is to take a piece from my closet and Google Image it.  People love to post OOTD pics (thanks everyone!) and sometimes that can give some great inspiration as well.

Here is how I usually do my planning:
1. Either in my planner or a piece of legal paper I leave on my vanity I write down each day and my scheduled activities.  If I have meetings at work I will need to dress up for, I can see them and plan accordingly.  I also write down one "back-up" spot.  Let's face it...we all have those days when "nothing feels comfortable."  Having a back up plan allows you to figure out a comfy and chic outfit before it's needed, rather than in the heat of the moment.  
2.  Let the brain storm begin.  Flip through magazines, browse the internet, look through your own closet and pull out something fabulous you haven't work in awhile and take it to the next level.  
3. List your outfit, shoes, belts, jewelry and all.  Figure out what type of underwear you need each day.  Make sure it's clean!
4.  Look at what needs ironing/steaming/washing.  Get to work!  I like to steam a day in advance or often, the morning I am going to wear it.  I think clothes just feel more polished and put together when steamed right before leaving.  Polish up any dirty shoes.  Make sure you can find all your jewelry without digging around too much.  Plan any dry cleaning.  (I just experimented with a ton of new washing/hand washing/dry cleaning products and styles - a new post to follow!!)  The more that is ready right away the less hustling around you will need to do.  
5.  Try things on!  See if you like the combinations.  This happens to me all the time: I plan out an outfit I think is going to be great and a perfect fit.  The next thing I know I get it on and it is a miserable failure and I am rushing to make sure I am out of the house on time.  Trying things on before you get down to the final hour will help make things so much easier.  If you need to adjust you will know that what you are looking for is clean and ready to go - not wrinkly at the bottom of a hamper, like my favorite options usually tend to be.  
6.  Figure out which coat or piece of outwear you need each day.  I love reaching into the closet knowing which jacket I'm going to wear.  Sweater and hems hanging too far underneath the bottom, skirts and dresses that don't show under a trench coat...all my pet peeves.
6a.  I also use this process (because I am VERY type A) to plan my mani/or manis for the week.  There is nothing I dislike more than not having the right manicure to match my outfit.  Or having a mani that chips mid-week.  I plan a color that will go with all of my outfits, paint my nails at the end of the weekend, and have a second color listed that will go with my outfits for the rest of the week.  This step is optional, unless you are very type A like me!  I also really enjoy painting my nails (post on this to follow as well).  It is very relaxing and instantly lifts my mood for the next days that follow.  
7.  Get to bed early and set your alarm 10 minutes later!  Yay!  So much time is saved each morning by having a plan.  I love to think in the shower and so instead of trying to decide what I feel like wearing and if I will have enough time to pick out and outfit and do my hair, I can slow down and prepare myself for the day.  OR keep that alarm clock 10 minutes early and pack and healthy lunch and make a nice, warm coffee for the commute.  

I hope this helps streamline your morning routines!